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Posts Tagged ‘small things’

‎Up this morning and look out the window to see the snow falling.

Quick hugs and kisses, cereal in a bowl and juice in a cup.

Pull on jeans, curse under my breath.

Teeth brushed, hair combed, two new grey hairs examined and dismayed.

Boots on, hat on, gloves on.

Purse? Check. Grocery list? Check. Hockey equipment? Check.

Into the car and out we go into the snow.

Down the same roads, past the same houses, ‎around the same corners.

Tie the skates, snap the helmet, fill the water bottle. Give a tap on the shoulder pads and tell her to have fun.

Now I sit in the stands, cold butt on a hard wooden bench, shivering, chattering, trying not to spill the tea I hold in my mittened hands.

A regular Saturday morning.

There are probably those who see my life and think it is small.

From time to time I am one of those people.

And then there are times like now, when I can appreciate the small, taste the sweetness of the small like the warm tea on my lips.

‎Wishing for a beautiful, small Saturday.

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Apparently I’m not supposed to sweat them, all of those small things that happen. I’m supposed to take deep breaths and gain perspective, put them in context and meditate them away.

That all sounds good in theory. On another day I would say I subscribe to the ‘no sweating’ philosophy.

That is until I’m actually faced with a day overflowing with them.

It’s been a day of small things. Those annoying, crappy little things that taken individually I could laugh at, roll with, accept with grace, but when all gathered together make me unable to do anything remotely graceful.

It started with a small ‘clink,’ the sound made when a charm from my newly purchased necklace fell smoothly from the chain as I tried to close the clasp. ‘Clink’ as it bounced directly off the bathroom counter and effortlessly slipped down the drain.

Oh man.

In the car, rushing to the station on the only day in months when it is imperative that I be at the office at a certain time. All of the lights are red. Every other day all those lights are green. But not today.

Of course.

Rushing, rushing, rushing, I make it in time, only to sit at my desk for 45 minutes waiting for the call that the person I was supposed to meet with had arrived. I rushed, she did not.

Not good.

There were projects that were supposed to be due next week that are now due tomorrow, printers that jam, papers that cut, computers that crash.

This day has nit-picked me into submission. Some bad days are like a sucker punch; today was more like a series of annoying jabs to the side of the head. I’m laying face down on the mat and I don’t want to get up. I want to wallow, feel sorry for myself, run through the day’s annoyances over and over.

I’m sure that eventually I will find perspective. I will realize that the day could have been worse. I will come to a place where I can remind myself that there are worse days, that I have had much worse days. Days that break you, leave you in a puddle, have you wondering why, why me?

I know this is not one of those days. And for that, above all else, I can be grateful. This day will be forgotten, I will move on, move forward. I will eventually look at the necklace and forget that it is missing a charm. The lights will be green, the projects will get done, another day will come that is better (or worse) than today and this day will fade away.

And eventually I will get there. I will sweep up all of these small things and throw them away, pick myself up, dust myself off and step back in the ring for another round.

But not now.

Not yet.

I’m still too pissed off about the necklace.

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